Old Telephone

My mom has saying when something is very dark. Or dirty like a really grimy greasy thing. She will say...

"That things is blacker than an old telephone"

I used to think it was because all the old rotary phones in old time PR were that shiny black color. Like the kind of black that Felix the Cat is. Does anyone remember or ever hear of Felix the Cat?
But I realized it is because those phones are all grimy and covered in years of sweat and skin caking onto the cradle and receiver. Like it is probably white underneath but it is black now an taking a simple rag to it will cut a streak down the middle. Like people will be "Holy shit. This stuff really cleans. Thank you, Magic Erarser! Fuck you, you filthy damn old telephone!"

My mother also has certain English words she uses in Spanish conversations. For about 20 years I honest to good thought that when she said something was dirty she was actually saying "This thing is guilty!"

Like it is so damn dirty that it needs to go to court.

But no...it is a guttural mispronunciation. of "Filthy"

Why she chooses to say this instead of something in Spanish is beyond me but it is part of her lexicon.