A Horrible Habit

A horrible habit I developed in the late spring is this rollercoaster relationship with sleep and work. Around 4pm each day my boss and administration fire off projects to be completed. This is a witching hour where the mound of paperwork I need to take home feels olympic in scope. I've spent hours in the dusty building doing all the stuff I can't jam from home. Painting. Chasing this spiderweb. Counting cash and feeding the maw of payables.

4pm is also my bluesiest part of the day where its not that the day is over but we are hours away from starting another one just like it.  That's when it get something done. "Is this too hard to do?" I appreciate the sympathy but the answer is to make it work. The ends justifies the means.

By 8:30pm or 9pm I do unwind because I find 15 minutes to sleep in my children's beds while they watch video. I will often bring a book to read while they cruise Youtube before bed time stories but i rarely crack it. "I am just going to close my eyes for a bit"

Then in the living room is swoop into a nadir where the coach swallows me until I wake back at 11:30pm or midnight and shuffle PDFs to a from their digital homes. My wife has already gone to bed and these nights they smell of coffee and the wet smoke smell of a snuffed candle. I want to constantly pee and twitch my legs. And bat back emails to people. Can I text them now? Aren't you up? Where is that payroll form. I need it. You won't get paid. Why don't you want to be paid!? Are you secretly rich?

Its the summer. The kids can sleep in, but my daughter taps on my feet at 6am and says "Good Morning."