Thursday, November 29, 2007

Mango Raking

As I mentioned in my last post, here is something about what I actually shoveled back home in PR.
While drawing from memories, the piece isn't truly autobiographical. I only raked mangoes once, maybe twice, in my life. And I just used my hands. Fingertips, actually since those things are messy! However, I loved the image of going around picking up mangoes as a chore. I scribbled out some notes in my journal and here is the blog version.


* * *

My grandmother spoke of plants in homespun anthropomorphisms. A tree my father planted never bloomed because it was "manly." A tiny weed, whose leaves reacted to touch, was "magic," and she mentioned an old neighbor that tried to label it as the eight wonder of the world. Right there in Mayaguez, Puerto Rico.

I am sure she would have described the mango tree in our neighbor's backyard as "pregnant." Fruit always seemed present on the tree, hanging down from leathery vines in the branches. While planted in the neighbor's yard, two solid branches jutted over the hibiscus strangled chain link fence and over our property. My mother said rats lived in the hollowed out recesses of the trees roots. "Go pick up the mangoes to stop the rats," she said, handing me crumpled up plastic supermarket bags from underneath the sink.

The mangoes begin rod shaped, hanging hard and green on the tree. They fall to the grass with soft thumps once they turn peppered emerald color filled with tiny black spots. They are in stark relief with the mangoes you see in the stateside supermarket. Those are softball sized balls that look more like avocados. My grandmother called these "Cuban" mangoes, which were better for straight up eating. Our mangoes, Puerto Rican ones, were better for making into jams and pastes. Better for baking too. She also called the hydroponic lettuce sold at store "Puerto Rican Lettuce" because it came from facilities on the island. Each bag was embossed with an outline of the island. This lettuce supposedly made you sleepy. "American" lettuce came only in bundles of threes. A single head of Romaine lettuce would have probably blown her mind.

The mangoes ripened on the ground, even though, at this point they already developed a blush coming from each end. Then like a banana they turned a splotchy black with a cucumber beetle orange skin. If left for too long, they became completely black with intermittent rings of deep purple in the bruises. At this point the fruit was so soft as to quiver when touched. These were my least favorite to pick up as I imagined centipedes and rats under each one. I filled the supermarkets bag full and carried them over to the trash at an arm's length. "Not in the trash, boy," my mother would say. "The rats will get them there!"

* * *

I wrote that stream of consciousness style, with some help from the notes. It shows. But, you got a post, eh!?

Peace!

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

More EEE!

Hey, you liking the somewhat regular posts, eh? Well TOO BAD because I just got slammed with some more stories for the paper and the Transformers Score came from Amazon today! Only thing greater than the movie was the rocking score composed by Steve Jablosnky. I know even less about music than I know about acting, but I know what I like. Thank you for the moving score Mr. Jablonsky!

Gosh, I'm a sucker for these heavy-handed action scores. Really like the Firefly/Serenity music as well. Especially that one part in Serenity where we pan to the ship re-entering a planet. The scene is very early on it them film, following the title. I dig the curly space banjo coming right after the somber liquid string notes. Here it is on YouTube.
Can you describe music as curly? I guess, I just did. Avoiding the snow by cutting through the IC music school during college finally paid off! YES!

For those of you unfamiliar with the Transformers score, play around on YouTube and take a listen. Here is my favorite:



Geeks: We may not know whose on the Top 40, but we sure can hum our favorite tune from Final Fantasy!

I will bring you a post sometime this week. What did I shovel growing up instead of snow. Mangoes. Yes, mangoes.


Come Mr. Tallyman....

Photo originally from University of California- Davis

Peace!

Monday, November 19, 2007

First Snow 2007

We all awoke to this on the West Hill.



The first snow of the season. Earlier this week, some of the higher elevations around here got a decent first snow, but the valley where the city lays makes for noticeable differences.

Don't expect me to blog all lyrical and Romantic about snow. I don't like winter at all. In the closing chapters of Watership Down, Richard Adams inserts a brief narration on winter. I don't know the exact text , but it goes something like this: "Some men say they like winter, but what they really are saying is they like the ability to combat it. With their coats, fireplaces, and woodlots, they can endure the season and find some enjoyment. But for animals, as for poor men, it is a harsh season when existence is the act of just surviving."

Sorry that I don't have the direct quote, but that thought sums up why I don't enjoy the winter season.

However, winter presents me with an interesting Catch-22. While I dislike winter as much as others longingly await the crunch of hoar frost under their new boots, I love the shovel snow.

Seriously, I LOVE TO SHOVEL SNOW. Just decimate the crap out of it! Carve out islands of non-slippery safety amongst all the white the neighbors have let accumulate. I make games out of it, dreaming up scenarios Walter Mitty or, better yet, Snoopy* style. Imagine it:

First Panel: "Here comes the world-famous snow shoveler."

Second Panel: Digging into the snow, a mound of the stuff already piled behind him, "He has to clear the path for the Colonial Militia! They need those cannons to take Fort Ticonderoga!"

Third Panel: Exasperated and leaning against the handle of the shovel. "It's just practice for Valley Forge!"

I worked for about a year and a half during college as a janitor. Well, Facilities Attendant, actually. It is a neat little euphemism that means you just don't clean toilets, you shovel snow! The sidewalk is a part of the facility, you see. Because it was a residential college, the administration wanted to make sure that every sidewalk and road was plowed. Last thing they wanted was for some kid to slip on the umpteen stairwells on the IC campus and have his or her parents sue the school. There was a joke that circulated amongst all the Physical Plant staff that went, "On the campus you really don't drive through snow, but through slush." Well, that sounds like a motto to live by! I had this "scorched earth" policy to clearing away snow. I used a lot of salt and pulled a muscle the first time I cleared the little dip between Terrace 3 and Terrace 4. When I worked as a barista, we had to clear the snow from the front of the store while on shift. The customers appreciate the plowed strip of sidewalk welcoming them for espresso and brewed coffee. Of course, I, once again, went nuts with the salt to the boss's and our petty cash fund's, dismay. One of these days, I will match when snow shoveling zeal with the appropriate amount of salt. Until then, I appreciated your patience, guys.

Why do I enjoy it so much? Everyone else hates it. It's a chore. Why love a chore!?

Maybe it's because I never grew up with snow, being from PR . Or because I am "selectively compulsive" freaking about having to get that snowed cleared. I do feel a nice sense of accomplishment after I am done with the snow and it does make me feel good. People appreciate plowed sidewalks and roads, and I appreciate their silent thanks. If you need some snow shoveling in and around the West Hill then contact me or look for the cleanest patch of asphalt in town!

Peace!

*I just finished reading a wonderful book called Schulz and Peanuts: A Biography by David Michaelis. Hence, the Snoopy reference. Amazing book about the iconic strip and the conflicted man behind it. I'm also reading Jimmy Carter's The Hornet's Nest which is about the American Revolutionary in the South. Hence, the Ticonderoga reference. Hey, it's a liberal arts blog.

Friday, November 16, 2007

Cracked!

It's fire and ice time here in Ithaca. I don't mean the changing seasons (I saw snow flurries on my walk to work today) or those blasts of hot air that wash out of buildings as you step in from the cold. No, I mean the swing in emotions the local populace can now begin to feel.

Still giddy from the Dalai Lama's visit to Ithaca, locals can now FREAK OUT again because John "Put Some Clothes On" Ashcroft is speaking at Cornell!

That's John "Let the Eagle SOAR!" Ashcroft!

That's John "I Know You Checked Out Danielle Steel Novels" Ashcroft!

John "Patriot Act" Ashcroft!

WOW! A real former member of the Bush junta is coming here! A Cabinet member! The sound you hear is the collective Ithaca Sound Machine pushing the dial way past 11! Or the Ithaca zeitigeist cracking in half.

I wasn't a fan of John Ashcroft and his Attorney General policies. However, I think it is wonderful he is coming here to speak. It's much different to hear an opponent actually speak and elaborate on why they think what they are doing is right, then to just listen to the sound bites at Moveon.org. I have learned from the townies and given up on trying to get tickets, but maybe there will be a live broadcast or a speech archive later.

I wonder if CU will cover up the naked statue outside Uris Hall for the event?

Peace!

Thursday, November 15, 2007

More Great Works Defiled!



JESSE JAMES BUNNY!

I'm the greatest American outlaw! I took the lives of over 15 men and feared no Pinkerton operatives. I never meet a train I wouldn't rob or a stagecoach I wouldn't turn. Oh, and the South shall rise again.

OH NO!



PIGGY FORD!

I sure did like Jesse, but I loved the reward money even better! I shot Jesse James, governor Crittenden! Love me! Oh, and fuck the South, even though I am from Missouri.

"Bah! Whatever, Piggy Ford! No one named Pokemon villains after you. Or whole American mythologies either, by the way."

"Whatever. I still killed you. Cause it's 187 on an undercover cop! YEAH!"

"What? That lyric isn't relative at all!"

"Oh, um. That picture is awful dusty?"

"Those are my last words! You thieving Yankee cowardly piggy!"

__________________________________________

Amanda and I saw The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford last week and I thoroughly enjoyed my first ever Western. However, I was disappointed by the lack of gunfights in my first ever Western. More gunfights! More swindling and horse rustling. More stereotypes!

Scratch that. I don't know very much about the Old West, but I do understand that most of the action around it was framed by the Reconstruction period. Former Confederates flew to the Territory hatching schemes on how to bring back Dixie. However, it was also known national for federal expansion and the conflict over local autonomy. Finally, it's the frontier and living on any frontier isn't easy. Gun fights weren't as deadly as in the movies because, well, it wasn't the movies. The railroad dominated the landscape and you had to be one tough criminal to take them on. Like most things in the American "Master Narrative," the imagery sometimes does not hold up to the reality.

I enjoyed the films rolling narrative and thought the voice overs were a nice touch. I read some reviews on Rotten Tomatoes that found it too didactic. While it did feel like the book the movie was based on just came onto the screen, the technique is justified. Jesse James story was a whole myth and you needed a separate storyteller to build all that. If we had that all through some words flashed on the screen then it would have been harder to absorb. They also gave the movie a good sense of pace, leading up to Jesse's assassination, building him as all to real man that was still legendary. Imagine if someone described you in a solid, haunting, lyrical voice-over.

By the time he was 23, Garik would be diagnosed with asthmatic allergies, as if the air were too rich for his introspection. He took full claim for all 93 blog entries, but little would read them. And he never meet justice for all the drinks he screwed up while as a barista for he fled Tompkins County to parts where people would believe, 'Yes, it's decaf.' I swear."

Finally, I like Brad Pitt no matter what anyone says. And I also like Ben Affleck and his brother is in the movie giving a great performance. It feels weird for me to say someone acted well. I don't know anything about acting except that I certainly couldn't even do a second of screen/stage time. Even if I was "Pedestrian 4" in the far left corner of the screen, I could not produce the right combination of standing in my costume and staying quiet necessary for high-caliber cinema. Forget it if I even had to move. Imagine me as "Guy Buying Fruit 2." Disaster.

With that said, even all those directors frien...err...I mean struggling actors you see in student films could out act me. Still, Brad Pitt and Casey Affleck rocked their respective roles. Pitt having this hurt bravado, a man increasingly paranoid, but still believing he was in control. Affleck runs with a dangerous innocence, someone inherently harmless and weak, but still capable of the simplest violence. Imagine a five-year old with a gun. Or something like that.

For more (eloquent) reading, the film critic for our paper, Nicholas NiCastro, did a great review of the movie for the paper in our October 29-November 4th edition. Check it out!

Peace!





Tuesday, November 13, 2007

More Local Legends

Been a while since I have blogged. I have been doing a lot of brainstorming about what I should focus my blog posts on. I tried comics for a while, but the comics blog-o-sphere is loaded with tons of little fish trying to be as good as the masters. I could weigh in on local issues, but that would be really unprofessional considering my position at the paper and I am just a pesky transplant anyway. Of course, there are masters there as well. Books maybe? You guys like books and reading? We shall see.

Here is a little series of anecdotes I wrote up about a little rumor my lovely GF Amanda told me about. I enjoy the fragmented style, but I realize that I am not that deft in applying it. It is more of a crutch for me, a handy way to frame stories. The style gives the narrative a "newsy" feel as if we were trying to garner the full picture from things we overheard on the radio or on the news ticker at CNN. Palahniuk did this with his last book Rant, framing it as an oral history of his protagonist.

I tend to write in sound bites anyway. A little scene here, then a quick scene there. I have focused what little professional writing I do on journalism because I do not have the patience to write a full fledged short story. Except for these blog posts, I write in a world where 800-words is a lot of space. I tried to find something, anything, about this rumor, but could not turn up anything. Tioga County is a relatively rural county with no county-wide newspaper. Maybe their local media haven't made as big a presence online. If anyone from Tioga County or Candor stumbles upon this, are these rumors true? Did someone every release cougars up there? Peace!

___________________________________

Shadow Cats

Terrence Liddle reinforced the floorboards in the tree stand. Since his grandfather passed, there had been little interest in hunting in the household and the wood turned soft and green. With the rumors, Gran forced him to take the post and protect the family investment on White Church Road. At the gas station, Gran heard that the animals could gauge out the siding from a house with their paws as big as catcher's mitts and claws longer than pocket combs. Terrence believed all that to be exaggeration, having looked up cougars in the old set of World Books his father kept in the crawl space.
"I don't think they get that big," he told her while Gran tried to convince his daughter Jamie of the gravity of cougar attacks.
"Oh, maybe this ones special because the whole town is talking about them!" She grabbed Jamie by the waist and made the girl sit on her lap. "I will stay here with her while you make sure that stand is alright."
Terrence remembered something from the encyclopedia, but ignore it. He made a final check of the new pine boards and nestled a cushion from the sofa up there. "Might as well be comfortable," he mumbled, the evening before his first watch.

* * *

"Lions, tigers, and bears! OH MY!"
"Shut up!"
"Lions, tigers, and bears! OH MY!"
"SHUT UP!"
"Lions, tigers, and bears! OH MY!"
"Oh, fuck you, Luke!"
She choked the silver door handle of the Buick and swung the heavy car door open. The hinges popped as the door swung shut. From the outside she fumbled for her cell phone under the yellow light of the lonely streetlight.
Luke rolled down the passenger side window. "Oh, c'mon, Marie. It's just a joke! A rumor!" He leaned further over and managed to get the crack the door ajar. "There aren't any cougars!"
"It was in the paper," she interjected. Far out on Route 33, the hills block any phone service and her phone chirped, "We're sorry" in harsh, soft tones.
Luke rolled his eyes. "The Random Observer, Marie. The new golf course on Route 95 was the headline. Just get back in the car."
Marie cocked her head to the side and saw the white glow of Dassy's Gas Station and Mini Market down below. She popped a leg over the wire divider and prepared herself to skitter down the embankment to the valley below. It wasn't that steep and even in the night the grooves would be familiar from the highway cleanups she did back in 4H.
Luke heard the gravel crunching. "Where the hell are you going!?"
"Away!" She slid off the gravel and began jaunting down the weedy hillside.
"Hey, hey!" Luke screamed from the driver's seat asking, "What the hell do I tell your parents when you don't show up!"
"A cougar did it," said a voice from close to the bottom.

* * *

Police Chief Deborah Capet spent the evening preening through the pages of a yellowed HTML help book the department bought years ago. No one had updated their department's website in years. She hammered out a quick message before a call on the radio reported another mysterious sighting.

* * *

Killing time in the public library and getting near the end of his 30-minutes, computer limit Virgil Stakum stumbled across the police department website. He ran search for "Tendia Town" and "Crime." On the welcome page he found:

Please be advised that it is illegal to discharge firearms within the borders of the Town of Tendia and all other county municipalities unless in self-defense. Illegal discharges and hunting will be prosecuted. Call 557-3870 for more information. Ask for Chief Capet. Thank you.

* * *

Trying to find a comfortable distance form the tape recorder, Town Supervisor Larry Corradino dismissed the rumors. He had dealt with reporters from Binghamton before, but he couldn't find his footing with this story. He later told his wife that, "There is no way to sound intelligent about it. The whole cougar fiasco."
But he tried with the reporter.
"Look the only cougars here are those at the high school," he said trying to crack a smile. The reporter didn't carry a notebook with him, so Larry got in close to the microphone, ignoring his previous apprehensions. "That's the mascot, you see."

* * *

The sound of gunshots disrupted church service all month long. Taking a historian though a tour of the First Presbyterians country cemetery, councilmember Peggy White apologized for the red discharged shells that peppered the woods behind the graves. "People just get a little carried away here when it comes to safeguarding the town!" She smiled her widest grin. "It's why we have so much history!"

* * *

The deer didn't seem to mind the supposed cougars. They still strolled down in the early light of Main Street, stripping the young leaves of forsythia shoots. Opening her bakery, Hope August told the newspaper delivery man if he had heard about the rumors. "Oh, yeah, Hope. Even as far as Syracuse where my cousin lives. He told me, 'Hey, Vince be careful with those cougars!'
Hope helped him heave a bundle inside and made sure the loud thud could be heard by the deer. They scampered away when it hit. "Well, sometimes I hope they had done their duty and controlled some of those deer," she said.

* * *

When the town library checked out all its book on big cats it started a wait list. Michael Bassett, terrified for his family, went to the elementary school library and sat in the plastic bucket chairs around the nature section. When a little girl asked him what he was doing, Michael just held up the cover of the book and the girl understood. "Ohhhhh, OK."

* * *

Elsewhere in the elementary school, Ms. Janson asked all her sixth grade students to write a short poem for their language arts class. Most centered around cats. Eve asked Ms. Jason if it was OK if her poem didn't rhyme.
"Well, sure, Eve. But why did you choose to go that way?"
Eve shrugged her shoulders, acting for the class as much as asking. "Nothing rhymes with cougar!"

* * *

Another child from Ms. Jason's class, Darien, spent the rest of the day in Principal Sherman's office. When he finally meet with Adelle Sherman, she asked Darien to read his poem again. Ms. Janson was there and so was Superintendent Digger. He read it:

Tiger, tiger, burning bright
In the forest of the night
What immortal hand or eye
Could frame thy fearful symmetry

"That's awful good for 12-year old boy," said Principal Sherman.
Darien almost cracked a smile, but Superintendent Digger quickly jumped in. "Ok, where did you steal that from?"
"It's Blake, Jim," interjected Ms. Janson.

* * *

At the coffee shop someone asked, "Where did all these cougars come from?" They must have been a tourist passing through to the wine trails in the next county. No one remembered their face. Could have been in a group. No one knew the answers. "They just are here," said a Denise Hutchinson, a waitress. Everyone agreed. After the stranger left, word began to circulate that Terrence Liddle had bagged one from his grandfather's tree stand.






Friday, November 02, 2007

Election 2007

Locally, (i.e. City of Ithaca) this year's election for various county positions is not too excited. My first election ever as a citizen of this city and everyone is running friggin' un-opposed! However, it's hard to keep me down when it comes to voting. It's the Puerto Rican in me. Puerto Rico has so many problems, in so many ways, but one thing that is so amazing is how it fields near 80% voter turnout each and every election year.

Seriously, I love to vote, and you should too, because no amount of Star Spangled knick-knacks can trump a single vote.

Democracy is kind off a big deal, so, if you are in Tompkins County, please get out a vote in any and all our your local elections. It's very un-progressive to not vote so if you are part of the "Ithaca Sound Machine," put all the rhetoric on the record. If you really like Carolyn Peterson, all of Common Council, and Herb Engman, then solidify their victories! It will probably make then feel a lot better if they win by a true mandate and not their closest dozen friends. And it will also clearly say that this is the local leadership we want, not some powerful circle of (insert your favorite pejorative here) that can scream the loudest.

If you are a part of the "Silent Majority" then STOP BEING SILENT! Write-in the opponents who lost in the primaries and, hell, write in Matt Murdock or Bruce Wayne! Deny them the sheer technical win! Tell them that maybe we weren't strong enough to have a candidate this year, but we will next time! And remember, this is Ithaca, so even just a handful of write-ins will get some sort of committee started-up where you can discuss the effectivenes of Zachary Winn or a kick to the face.

There is a competitive election for the state Supreme Court and the Sixth Judicial District and I admit that I am woefully un-informed. Seems like most of the action is concetrated in the candidates home areas and I don't spend any time in Coopperstown, NY! I got some research to do.

PEACE!

Sunday Morning

 My father was not a man of faith That is something I stole from him, that phrase I use to politely defuse the handsome couple at my door on...