Journal Entry 9-27-19

This is the work double speak. I am sure it applies to any office

"My computer doesn't work" really means "I don't know how to use my computer"

"The copier was jammed" really means "I jammed and but don't want to admit to it"

"Oh, I missed that email" really means "I ignored it."

"I didn't see the calendar invite" really means "I ignore calendar invites"

"I don't do email. Can you send it to me via paper" really means "I don't care about the thing at all. And this is my way to deflect"

"No one ever told me" really means "I never listened"

"Whatever you think" really means "I don't want to make a decision"

For sure there are times when these are true. And I have used specific granular ones like "Thats a landlord issue" to buy some time.

But the response, like earlier posts, is "Ok"

Ok something being "Let me help you because you are so cool. Can you be my friend!? You are so pretty and funny and its not big deal!"

Ok something being "I do not like you but my duty and honor say I must help you!"

Its rarely neutral. Its like when my wife texts back "K." Shit...that means something is up!

I found a real honesty when a co-worker once verbatim called me an asshole. We worked it out and it was refreshing where all the other niceties seemed draining.

I should stop blogging about work while I'm in my feelings. I should find something else to validate me.