Thursday, January 16, 2020

Audience Check and Another MTG Post

Looking at my blog metrics it appears that now two people regularly read these posts. I have no clue who these folks could be except you can DM me on Twitter @garikapc. That is usually where some of these posts begins. As 240 character screeds where I shake my linguistic fist at phantom inconveniences. Maybe you came from there? Or maybe not? MAYBE YOU ARE A FAVORITE TEACHER!? Eek...sorry about all those posts. I know you are not Mami...quizas? But anyway, thanks!

Anyway here is the post and sorry that it is an MTG post but that seemed to be the trend this week.

Not going to lie but a lot of the 7th graders think I am cool.* Well, a lot of the 7th graders that play Magic The Gathering think I am cool. Which means like 5 kids. But these kids are constantly asking me to play with them. Which is sweet but I have no time after school. That is when I push paper and scrub down stalls and make sure my own son isn't screaming down the halls.

"Mr. A! I challenge you to a game of Magic the Gathering" said one as I passed him in the hall.

And my heart gushed. "Sure! What kind of deck do you play?"

"Mono black mill."

"...Is it Modern or Standard?"

"What?"

"Nevermind. Ok, sure ask your teacher."

"It is very good. I have only ever lost once in my playgroup and it is only 40 cards."

At this point I knew the kid, while well intended, was playing the trickiest of combo decks.

First, if you are not initiated then a MTG deck must have 60 cards.** I have seen some wild "kitchen table" (ie casual rules) in my day but never someone arguing to have less cards in their deck. There is a reason my your yet to be drawn cards are referred to as "gas" and cards like "Mind Flayer" or "Brain Blast" (Mind you I don't think these are actual cards) have an effect of making you discard cards.

A mono black mill deck? To the un-initiated (and why you are still here I am not sure), mill is a strategy where you don't win by killing someone. You win by making all their cards go into their discard. When they can't draw a new card, they lose. More often than not the person gets locked out of doing anything and just concedes. Mill is the "cult classic" of Magic win conditions barring actual goofy alternative win conditions like Happily Ever After.

I lost to this once on Arena and I am still face palming


Newer players love mill because it is so quirky. Its like when you first see a Monty Python movie and need to tell everyone about it but do so by saying NEE! to everyone. I love mill because it feels good. If you are one of those people that loves those Oddly Satisfying videos then you would love mill.

But in the five colors of Magic blue is the main mill one with black being the complement. A mono-black one? Its like Robin beating the bad guys all by himself.

Now, I don't play much competitve constructed Magic but I would guess Mono-Black Mill is equivalent to a Tier 4 modern deck. Saying it is not so great. But, that's fine. Its just a middle school library.

Doing a bit of digging I find that its a thing with a bunch of combo pieces like Altar of the Brood, Heartless Summoning, and Myr Retriever. THere is even an old The Mana Source video about it in Pauper.



So, that makes the 40 cards make sense. Because it lets him get to whatever combo he needs and just locks the opponent out. Would be awesome if it is wasn't cheating.

It is very hard to explain without knowing the game but imagine you are playing basketball except each team has their own ball. A red ball, yours, and a blue ball, theirs. THe blue ball is slightly smaller and faster than the red one. So it goes into the hoop quicker. It doesn't rattle as much. It leaves people hands faster on the pick and roll.

SO thats why. Because he can just sit around and the law of averages makes him get whatever 1 or 2 combo pieces he needs. I would lose because you just don't expect that since it is illegal. THe kid is pulling a Kobayahi Maru from Star Trek!

But, I am going to build my deck to ruin his whole day!



The great thing about Magic is the variance that lets even casual players beat pros. Not to say I am anything but casual but I don't plan on losing to a ginned up 40 card ringer deck! I get rick rolled by kids all day but not this day!



*I have a pair of Pokemon shirts that the younger ones love. They are Art Nouveau style Eevee evolutions. I love Art Nouveau and I love Eevee. And apparently so did a fair piece of the more weeby 6th grade girls because their teacher approached me once and said, "I need to see this shirt all the 6th grade girls are wild about." Which made me feel icky.

**Unless you are playing a format called Limited, where you build decks from packs you just opened Then 40 cards is perfect! This was not it. These kids are whipping out spot Sealed events.

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